D – Depression [An Interview]

Interviewer: Hello, I’m back! I must admit, I’m a bit nervous about this interview, considering what happened last time with Anxiety, but I don’t want to be bothered looking for a new job so I’m stuck here for now. It’s time to interview someone else, and our guest today is Depression. Welcome Depression, thanks for coming here.

Depression: . . .

Interviewer: How are you?

Depression:  . . .

Interviewer: Could you please tell us a bit about what you do?

Depression:  . . .

Interviewer: Um, maybe there is something in particular you would like to discuss today?

Depression:  . . .

Interviewer: You seem a bit distracted, could you look at the camera at least once please, just for a bit, so we can get a good shot of you?

Depression:  . . .

Interviewer: OK, never mind then… You don’t have to be here if you don’t want to, we can do this another time? Do you want to stop?

Depression: Sorry. I’m probably messing things up. Do you want me to go? There’s probably someone who can do it better than me.

Interviewer: No no no, it’s fine. Nothing to worry about. Please, we want you to stay, it’s you who we want to interview!

Depression: That’s nice of you to say. Sorry I was quiet earlier. I was so exhausted, as it takes a lot of energy to do anything. And when someone asks me how I am, I don’t know how to answer. If I say the truth, things get awkward. I feel bad lying and saying I’m good when I’m not.

Interviewer: I’m sorry to hear you’re not doing too well. I guess it must not feel nice, being sad all the time?

Depression: It’s so much more than sad, dear Interviewer. I also feel an intense grief, emptiness, loneliness and hopelessness. I hate myself because I feel like this and I hate myself because it’s so hard to get out of this state. I feel sorry for the humans I touch, as they live with this every day, like me.

Interviewer: Golly, that sounds awful. Is there anything we can do to help?

Depression: Different things work for different people. We are all individuals, after all. Some like to talk about it, and have someone simply listen to them without judgement. Others like advice and reassurance from those who have recovered. Some just want a distraction from it all, friends who don’t ask questions. A few want help but are too afraid to reach out. They should. It’s so nice to be free.

Interviewer: So recovery is possible?

Depression: Of course. Professionals, medication, and a supportive network are a great help.

Interviewer: Some people liken you to a black dog, but to me, personally, you look more like a dark stormy fog. You keep swirling around, and I think you’ve made the room a bit colder.

Depression: Sorry. Well, I guess I am both solid and something else. You carry the weight of me on your shoulders and the pain of me in your chest, while your brain becomes clouded as my black gas seeps into your eyes, nose and ears, dulling your senses. I sound more menacing than I actually am, because to be honest, I am afraid of myself too. I tend to weigh people down. Small actions that other humans take for granted, such as washing themselves, eating, going out, getting the chores done, become incredibly hard for those who have me around.

Interviewer: That sounds so difficult. But I admire your honesty, Depression. You describe yourself for what you are – an all encompassing illness.

Depression: Yes, I am an illness, and while I start in the mind, I can have physical repercussions. Yet an unfortunate part is that some people don’t believe that I exist. That I am simply a passing ghost of sadness, or a moody teenager, or a lazy adult wanting attention. That’s because you can’t see me when I am hanging over someone. I am invisible to all but the carrier.

Interviewer: Do you tend to settle on anyone in particular?

Depression: Nope. Any age or gender. Any religion or country. I often get drawn to young ones though, or those with low self esteem. While I feel guilty for touching so many individuals they tend to be more understanding, patient, and compassionate as a result of me. They are also extremely strong and resilient. The sad part is, they often don’t realise it. They also know they are not alone, but sometimes that’s not enough.

Interviewer: Let’s try a lighter question. How do you spend your time?

Depression: I fight my way through the day. Now and then I can’t help myself, and I stare into space and do nothing. Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I do bad things to try and feel again. Sometimes I lie in bed. Occasionally I even go out for a drink, or fifty, with Anxiety, we cause a lot of havoc, ha. But hey, I came out here for the interview at least. Maybe when I get home I’ll have a bath. Some days are better. I can take care of myself, or I can appreciate the colours of the world.

Interviewer: Good on you. To be honest, that’s a weird imagine in my head, a dark cloud hovering in a bathtub!

Depression: It’s OK to be weird.

Interviewer: Well, thank you so much for coming, really, thank you. For showing up, for being brave, and letting us interview you.

Depression: No worries. It’s important for people to know the truth about me. And to know that if they work hard to take care of themselves, they can still have a fulfilling and magical life. They have to know they’re not allowed to give up.

 

 

Thanks for reading! :o) I will probably post once a week from now on, aiming for Thursdays!

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5 thoughts on “D – Depression [An Interview]

  1. Pingback: O – Obsessions | ENCYLOPEDIA OF RECOVERY

  2. Pingback: P – Pride | ENCYLOPEDIA OF RECOVERY

  3. Pingback: C – Choice | ENCYLOPEDIA OF RECOVERY

  4. Pingback: C – Choice | ENCYLOPEDIA OF RECOVERY

  5. Pingback: T – Trauma | ENCYLOPEDIA OF RECOVERY

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